“Children are not objects that we could control or shape to fit our ideals…Children are indeed uncontrollable, but that is not the root of the challenges parents face.  It is the tendency to control the uncontrollable that makes parenting problematic for many. The only things that we truly have control over are those that lie within the self – how choose to we see our children, think about their behaviours, and act with or towards them. “

Click this link to read full article by Kenny Toh, Founder of Institute of Advanced Parentology

When You Stop Controlling, You Gain Control

My life experiences have taught me this: We cannot control anyone… Not even one’s children or our unconscious “reactions.” Our brain is a complex series of chemical reactions that absorbs information from all our senses, past experiences, environment, and DNA. Our default “reactions” were programmed into our brain during conception to age 6. What we can CONTROL is where we focus our energy, the environments we choose to create and how we choose to RESPOND once we become aware of our negative reactions. We all have the power to focus on changing our OWN behaviors and thoughts, letting go of judgement, understanding and empathizing with others reactions, and gaining news skills to get our own needs met as well as trusting others to do the same. When we do this, then we can influence great positive change on anything, including how our genetic code gets expressed (i,e. epigentics) as well as overwrite negative programming in our brain and for anyone we interact with. Please make a conscious choice to BE A POSITIVE INFLUENCE.